Pizza  Love Thrusting Follow @justbemysquishy No Heroes Allowed

lizziemcganja:

friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?

me: i don’t have money

friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay

me:

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awmailk:

Justin Bieber’s lawyer probably

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doglets:

there’s a thin line between word and world

heliolisk:

bad people shouldnt be allowed to have clear skin or good hair or nice jaw lines or green eyes

piplump:

When you find fries in the bottom of your McDonald’s bag

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condom:

"what’s your dream boyfriend like" Well mostly a dream

babyferaligator:

*steals ur girl* *mom finds out and makes me return her and apologize*

imsoshive:

me: what’s for dinner?

her: *spreads her legs*

me: 

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so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it. 

intergalacticbarbie:

Time is a cruel unforgiving mistress
dankotaxvx:


hey mom my friends are here, ill be back later